Settling Down and Sizing Up

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    Today was my Day of Recalibration, wisely suggested by my friend Tracy, when I would arrive a day before the festivities begin to allow my body and brain to re-adjust to sleep and sun and blood flow. More sage advice. Thus, I sat by the enormous pool with the water the same majestic blue as the cloudless sky. Disconnected from the world---and the news, thankfully. The accommodations are royal, the people are polite and sparse (mostly German, by my uni-lingual ear), and the bugs and humidity are nonexistent.

    The most interesting part of the scenery---aside from the Great frickin' Pyramid peeking above the treetops---is the cascade of little differences between the U.S. and here. Just one example. What's missing? Signage for the lazy and litigious Americans. Signs demanding No Horseplay, No Running, No Diving. No Slippery When Wet stenciled all over the joint. When I got out of the pool the first time, I slipped on the wet pavement (down on one knee, a bystander asked if I was okay, no harm, no foul) because, surprise, the pavement was wet. I didn't need to see the message of obviousness defaming every surface of the lovely scene. No safety equipment hanging on the walls. Nothing that stupid Americans need to be told, just in case we're idiots and decide to sue. The streets of Istanbul were the same. No yellow safety strips. No railings next to short drop-offs.

    Tonight at 6pm, I'll meet my traveling companions. We'll meet our Team Leader, discuss the itinerary, and then enjoy dinner together. I've heard we are a party of eight. How many solo travelers, I wonder. What nationalities, what careers, what secrets, what stories?

    In whodunits, the murder victim is always a person you don't mind seeing get whacked. Typically he or she is not well defined, not intriguing nor necessarily likeable, since they'll soon disappear from the narrative. I imagine, upon our first meal, assessing the members of my tour group, seeing which one will be the victim of ghastly mayhem. I hope I'm not the least interesting person in the room.

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